The New NEW Year

I have decided that since January wasn't exactly a stellar month for me (and many of the people I love), I'm going to leave it behind along with 2009. I'm going to pretend this year starts tomorrow, February 1st.

In the New Year, I am going to REALLY study Spanish and try to speak it more. But, if for some reason, I don't, I'm not going to beat myself up about it. I am not going to worry about being single for the rest of my life, and I am not going to worry so much about figuring out my career.

My New Year's Resolution is to stop worrying about things that are ultimately out of my control and do a better job of living in the moment.

Over the past week, I have been reminiscing about how much fun I had in college, I've been reminded why I love Albuquerque and all my wonderful friends there so much, and most of all, I've been reminded yet again that there is no rhyme or reason why things happen the way they do in life. Since none of us know when our journey is going to end, there's no reason to worry so much about a future we're really not guaranteed to have. So if anyone hears me complaining about any of these things, please remind me of my resolution. Feliz Año Nuevo! Happy New Year!

Sending Love, Strength and Happy Memories to the 505

One of the major downfalls of living abroad is when something terrible happens back home, said person living abroad is left feeling totally helpless. Last night, Jenny (who is marooned in England) called me on Skype to tell me that one of our friends, Ben had been killed in a car accident.

Besides being a ridiculously talented soccer player, Ben was also one of the most genuinely nice (and most humble) people I know. He and Todd were like peanut butter and jelly and wherever they went, everyone was guaranteed to be laughing. Even though we sometimes complain about how small Albuquerque is, and life has taken all of us on different paths, one of the special things about it is when it comes down to it, everyone really cares about each other. Although we are all connected in different ways and through different people, we are very lucky in that we have great friends no matter where we go. Even though many of us hadn't seen Ben in awhile, the ominous feeling that someone is missing from our circle is still there. Senseless tragedies like this never add up and at times like these, the quote I took from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory writer David Seltzer says it all: "For some moments in life there are no words." I can't think of anything to say that will bring any of my friends at home comfort right now. All I can say is that we have our memories of Ben to bring smiles to our faces and we have each other to lean on.

I want everyone at home to know that I am with you in spirit and I hope you all find strength in each other. Remember to make the most of every day because life is short. As Jenny's mom, Susan said, "Remember to love and hug while we can." We will miss you Ben.

Madrid is Glue and I am Puzzle Pieces

For some reason, I keep forgetting it's 2010. I've only been back in Madrid a week and already January is over. What the heck happens when you graduate from college? It's like life goes from slow motion to 90 miles an hour in about a minute. I miss the slow lane.

Today, a friend was asking what I'm going to do when I get back to the States in July. I have to admit, the answer that came out of my mouth surprised me a bit. Maybe it's the fact that I've yet to arrive at what I'd consider 'real adult' status (paying rent, owning things, having a 401k, having debt) and the relationships I've had (all two of them in college), were far from 'adult.' Nonetheless, the response that came out of my mouth was...drumrolll please "I feel like I'm ready to be an adult." Does that mean I'll refer to myself as a woman instead of a girl - probably not, because most days, I feel more like a girl than a young woman.

Although I love living in Madrid, I can't help but feel that I'm some how delaying reality. To a point, it's a good thing to stave off reality as long as possible, given the state of the U.S. economy and the fact that I'm still not sure where my career path will take me. However, I have arrived at a few very important conclusions while I've been in Madrid, one of which is, I know now what makes me happy. Given the randomness that has been my life since college graduation, that, in itself, is quite an achievement. More on that another day.

Ahhhhh...Back to my Stress Free Euro Life

I am counting my lucky stars after all the crazy holiday travel stories I've heard over the past few days. In hindsight, it seems the British Airways strike (which didn't happen), saved me from having to deal with the "storm of the century" in Europe. Both the ida and the vuelta (the out and back flights), were on time and I didn't have to stand in any long check-in lines. The only hiccup was that one of my bags did not arrive with me. It was supposed to arrive last night, but didn't get here until tonight. At least I've got it now...
I wrote this post at McDonald's during my lunch break because I spilled water on my laptop last night and it's drying out until Friday night. I pray that is all it needs - please cross your fingers for me.
Once I get all of my belongings reorganized and my computer is up and running again, I think I'll feel totally readjusted to Madrid life. It's been very strange and at the same time, wondrous, to fit in seamlessly in 3 different places (San Jose, Albuquerque, Madrid). I suppose it's because nothing really changes and I have great friends and family who welcomed me wherever I went. I am a very fortunate young lass. Thanks to everone who put me up over the break - I love y'all and I had a great visit! XOXO